Rate my haunted flat insurance claim

So I was genuinely joking when I made my last post about stuff moving in my flat, but it got me thinking: has anyone ever actually tried to claim paranormal activity on their home insurance? I looked up my policy and it's completely silent on ghosts. Just says "accidental damage" and "malicious damage."

Neither category really covers a poltergeist, does it? If my telly gets thrown through a window by an invisible force, is that malicious damage (by the poltergeist) or accidental (caused by paranormal event)? Does the insurance company accept "a ghost did it" as a claim reason?

I'm imagining the phone call: "Hello, I'd like to claim for my damaged kitchen cabinet. Yes, it was opened and closed repeatedly by something I can't explain. No, I don't have CCTV evidence because ghosts don't show up on camera. Well, sometimes they do, but not mine."

Seriously though, has anyone ever dealt with insurance and paranormal claims? Or is this just the worst possible excuse in the eyes of insurance companies?

This genuinely made me laugh. I reckon the insurance company would classify it under "Acts of God" and then refuse it anyway on a technicality. You'd need to prove the ghost caused the damage, which requires proving ghosts exist, which... you see the problem. 😄

There's actually been a few cases where people have tried to claim supernatural activity caused property damage. They all got rejected, obviously. Your best bet would be to claim accidental damage if you broke something yourself and just blame the poltergeist in your head while you're on the phone with them.

Do ghosts not show up on camera? Tell that to literally every paranormal investigator ever

I once asked an insurance broker about this as a genuine question and they said paranormal damage would probably fall under "third party damage" but you'd need to prove the identity of the third party. So technically you could claim if you could produce the ghost in court. Obviously impossible, so no ghost damage claims have ever succeeded as far as anyone knows.

The funny thing is, if you actually experienced something like this and damage resulted, your only claim would be if you could prove it was caused by someone else in the building. Which is why your mate probably shouldn't actually be experiencing mysterious damage he can't explain. Insurance companies hate that.