How I imagine our government meetings go about Quirk Reports

Right, so I had this ridiculous thought at work today. Imagine the civil servants at the Ministry tasked with monitoring paranormal forums. What would those meetings actually be like?

Meeting Minutes - Paranormal Intelligence Division, 14:00 Thursday

Item 1: Is Quirk Reports a Threat? (Action: Derek) Derek's been monitoring us for three years. He's probably got a PowerPoint. 'They're talking about big cats again, sir. And UFOs. Someone mentioned Rendlesham Forest, which we definitely didn't cover up.' 'Derek, the only thing Quirk Reports is threatening is our biscuit supply.'

I reckon Derek's favourite member. Probably likes the jokes and the skeptic arguments because they save him paperwork.

Derek's 100% real. I'm convinced he's also on Reddit debunking stuff, but it's the same Derek. Works night shift at GCHQ, absolutely hates Thursdays.

This is brilliant. Derek would definitely post 'source?' on all our threads as a cover. Classic Derek move.

Poor Derek. Stuck in a basement reading about black cats on Cannock Chase when he could be doing literally anything else.